Celah

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I haven’t seen my father in over 20 years. My parents divorced when I was one. My older brother who is four years older than me probably remembers a little more. I was born in Kansas City Missouri but when my parents divorced my mother move to South-Central Los Angeles with my grandparents. We were the original “Blaxicans” because at one point my mother, brother, grandparents, aunt, uncle and my two cousins all lived in a three bedroom house and shared one bathroom (that’s South LA humor). As uncomfortable as that sounds my childhood was filled with joy on the 1700 Block of 42nd and Western. If you’ve ever heard the legendary rapper Ice T talk about living geographically in between some of the largest and most popular crip and blood neighborhoods in south Los Angeles, that’s where I grew up and Ice T lived on my block too. Growing up fatherless in this environment was very dangerous to say the least. Not so much because of the gangs and the violence but more so that I was fatherless and searching for manhood. Fast forward thirty plus years I’d become a father, husband and leader in my home and quietly came to the realization that I was never truly prepared to do none of this. What a horrible feeling right? That’s where the men of God stepped in. After asking God in prayer for a man’s help he sent me a retired bus driver “church gypsy” who started pointing me in the right direction which set me on a coarse to where I’m presently, in fellowship with a strong body of believers at CFBC where they’re “maturing disciples to make disciples.” As a result of God’s grace on my life in less than two weeks I’ll be reuniting with my dad who I haven’t seen in twenty plus years. How is this possible? I prayed for help to be a man. God answered that. I prayed for the opportunity to tell my dad I love him even though he was never been there for my brother and myself. God answered that.

Why would I want to do that you ask?

Because I looked back over my life recently and I saw God’s grace and Peace ALL OVER IT. From my rebellion in the streets of Los Angeles to the streets of McAlmont, (one of the backdrops for the documentary Bangin In Little Rock) to passing out at the wheel of a car TWICE and walking away UNHARMED BOTH TIMES! No one has to tell me God is a miracle worker and is gracious. Because of the great sacrifice I know Jesus Christ paid for all that wickedness I caused and still do because of my sin, I have no right to hold a grudge on a Father who blew it. God has told me I’m forgiven because of Jesus’ sacrifice for my sins but I can’t tell my dad he’s forgiven for his? Yeah, some may have to wrestle with that a while and I understand but it’s true. I feel closer to God as a result, I know intimately what it’s like to want to demonstrate love to whom some think are the unlovable. Well this blog as you can see will be a safe place for all of us to tell the truth. I’ll be sharing what I learned from the streets, corporate America and my favorite family The Church but when I say The Church I mean The Ecclesia, just to be clear. There’s a lot of experience I gained on this journey that I’m still on and I’m ready to share the parts I’m clear about. My hope is that it encourages and inspires and it creates some food for thought. Welcome to Grace and Two Fingers. A Safe Place to Tell the Truth #thewholestory Pray for me as I pray for you. Love ya’ll.

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